Monday, 19 September 2011

Parenting methods: Unconditional Love and The best piece of advice

We are two Mums.
We both have similar parenting methods.
We both have Baby Led Weaned our girls. 
We have both let our girls get their clothes covered with strawberries as they learn to feed themselves.
We have both let our girls splash in puddles and get covered in mud as they play (good clean mud only!)
We both don’t iron our children’s clothes (I don’t iron my own clothes let alone my children’s clothes unless we visit Great Nana and Granddad, as that is a little like visiting the queen…I was once scorned for dressing the Naughty in denim!! Girls in denim! Great Grannies eh!!)
We both didn’t give our daughters dummies. Danger baby didn’t want one and I chose not to give Ida one.
We both get on our soapbox if riled!
We both rarely brush our hair! Never enough time!
We are both a little bit mad! Well….Sarah’s crazy…me a little odd perhaps!?
We both have decided to start a business while our children are small.

Crazy! I know!!

As new parents we all receive advice from fellow mummies, our own Mums and professionals about how best to bring up our children. Cultural differences, personal choices and learning as we go along all mean we make different choices when bringing up our children. Nobody is right, nobody is wrong. My choices have been made for many reasons.  Here are a few of them,

Because the way I have been brought up.
Because of the lifestyle I live with my partner
I want the best for my children.
Because I am a little hippy and like to be abit different

All I know is that through being a Mum and meeting other Mummies, we all have one thing in common. We all have the best intentions for our children. We may not agree with how other people decide to bring up their children, nor may we agree with the methods that they do it.  Sarah and I met at our anti-natal classes amongst three other couples. All of us have bought up our children very differently (the debate of last week...mucky pups!). All of them I respect for their choices even if i choose to parent in a different way. 

Whilst tweeting (working!) this morning I stumbled across a tweet from a fellow mummy blogger about her 11-year-old boy who has started lying. Only small white lies, but lies all the same. Now I am not there yet. My two are both under 2. I can’t imagine how hard it would be to tackle the lying subject with an 11-year-old. I am still learning and struggling now that the naughty has leant to say NO!
(Such a horrible word. If I say it we have floods of tears from her…. if she says it, it means I am in for a BAD day!! She’s Stubborn!! No- can’t be from me!)
This Mummy was asking for help…how should she deal with her son lying so blatantly?
So I sat…and thought about how I could help. Then I remembered the best piece of advice I was ever given from a friend. Don’t judge or advsie another Mum until your child has been there. 

So I tweeted back my support and wished her luck instead. Who am I to judge or advise when my two naughties are yet to get there.
We are still struggling with NO!

Help! Anyone!?


  1. Nice blog post, sounded so familiar. my advice would be to get used to the word NO....however hard you try you'll be using it A LOT over the coming years!!! It's important for our children to learn they can't do/have everything they want and some behaviour is not acceptable. Mine are 5,7 and 9. We still say no......

  2. Thanks Susan, Kathryn's not talking as yet but bets are on that one of the first words will be nooooooo...