Thursday, 22 September 2011

When children don't play's tough on Mummy & Baby

Uh oh! Woman driver!

I've started taking DangerBaby to social activities like toddler groups, play areas, and swimming! She's 16m and craves the company of her own kind; children. It doesn't matter if they're older or younger just not adults. So when we can't organise a meet up with one of the NCT Mummies and their little ones we head out.

I'm trying very hard not to be a 'helicopter parent' hovering over my child protectively, as she toddles about at high speed exploring the world and rejoicing in other children. I have a lovely little girl who is happy and sociable. But she has very big feelings and can be upset by the smallest of injustices. So it breaks my heart when she's the victim of one of less sociable children.

Without exception, everywhere I have taken my child (including the church toddler group) she has been pushed over, hit or otherwise 'rough and tumbled' out of the way. It's usually the older girls that do the pushing or shoving. The result is always the same, my little one on the floor.

Playing nice
My little one sits there with a bemused look at first wondering how she ended up there and then realisation dawns and a sad bewildered look at the child that pushed her over. Why would a fellow child that she wants so much to play with ...not want to play with her?

If the shove was really hard we'll then have some silent tears. It's heartbreaking but also a tough lesson for us both to learn. I can't chastise and put a strangers child on the naughty step and usually my cry of 'hey!' has alerted the other child's Mummy and punishment occurs in their own way. 

However, if the shove came from an older child who should know better I do fight for my child in the only way the other child will understand. A serious whisper from adult to child “Santa doesn't visit naughty little girls /boys [delete as appropriate]”. 

When my Daughter can speak I'll teach her that sentence so that she can fight her own battles. Until then, all I can do is reassure my child, put her back on her feet and send her back out into the world.
2 seconds before this photo both were happily playing together

No comments:

Post a Comment